Suicide

Banta: Yeh chaaku kyun ubaal rahe ho?

Santa: Suicide karne ke liye



Banta: Toh phir ubalne kyu, kya zaroorat hai?

Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye!

Santa proposing a girl: Darling kya tum mujse shadi karogi?



Girl: Tameez se baat karo.

Santa: Behan ji, kya aap mujhse shaadi karogi?

less T.V.

While visiting Santa’s house, Banta noticed that he had replaced his usual TV with a smaller model.

smalltv.jpg

Thinking that perhaps the larger set has broken down, Banta asked why the small one was there.

“Oh,” Santa replied, “I have decided to watch less T.V.”

mosquito coil

Ek sardar doosre se keh raha hai ke “Maine machcharo ko ullu banaya !”

Second Sardar: “Kaise?“

mosquito-coil.jpg

First says: Maine mosquito coil mere bajuke room mein lagaya aur main apne room mein soya. ha ha ha ha…..

marriage

Santa: Why didn’t you marry?

Banta: I was searching for an ideal match.

Santa: So, you didn’t find an ideal girl?

friend1.jpg

Banta: I found one.

Santa: Then?

Banta: She was also searching for an ideal match

What’s Your Cast

Teacher 2 student : What’s Your Cast ?
Student : Pehle to hum Pandit The,
Fir Rajput Hue,
Fir Baniya ho Gaye,
Abhi Hai Darji,
Or
Aage AMMI ki Marzi

3 Chimps escaped from the zoo...

News: 3 Chimps escaped from the zoo...
1 was caught watching tv...
another playing football and
the third one was caught reading this txt message

Teacher to Sardar

Teacher to Sardar: Write your best friend's name in English.
Sardar wrote: ' Beautiful Red Underware'
Teacher: What?
Sardar: His name is Sundar Lal Chaddi

Sardar Get Engaged with girl

Sardar Get Engaged with girl,
soon he came 2 know she had no affair b4,
he brokn the relation every 1 asked the reason!He said
"JO KISI OR KI NA HO SAKI WOH MERI KIA HOGI

i want u 2 know dat our friendship

i want u 2 know dat our friendship
i want u 2 know dat our friendship means alot 2 me.U cry i cry.U lauf i lauf.U jump out of da window... I look down & den... i lauf again

I'm a killer

I'm a killer, i kill people for money
I'm a killer, i kill people for money, but you are my friend
I KILL YOU FOR FREE !!

First the engagement ring

First the engagement ring, then t
First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering

Merry Christmas, Enjoy New Year

Merry Christmas, Enjoy New Year,
Merry Christmas, Enjoy New Year, Happy Easter, Good luck on Valentines, Spooky Halloween & Happy Birthday Now bug off and don't annoy me for the next 12 months!!!!

If ur world is spining Round & Round

If ur world is spining Round & Round."
" If ur world is spining Round & Round..& Round....Ur heart is beating fast ,do u think its LOVE? na Munna na its called high B/P...

fullform of COLLEGE

Do U know the fullform of COLLEGE- "
"Do U know the fullform of COLLEGE- C-Come,O-On,L-Lets, L-Love, E-Each,G-Girl,E-Equally......Thats why boys go to college regularly...

RING

One day Santa"s Girlfriend asks him,"
One day Santa"s Girlfriend asks him, Darling, om our Engagement will you give me a RING?Santa:Ya sure, Give me ur Telephone No."

When i open my eyes every morning

When i open my eyes every morning
When i open my eyes every morning i pray to God that everyone should have a friend like you.... Why should only i suffer!!!

…PROBLEM & CHALLENGE…

**…PROBLEM & CHALLENGE…**

TEACHER:
what is the different between
problem and challenge????

STUDENT:3boys+1girl=problem
1boy+3girls=challenge..

Girl fully exhausted

Girl fully exhausted

A young girl after her honeymoon
came fully exhausted and tired,

When her friends asked her what happened?

She replied :
When this 70 year old bastard told me
he has saved a lot from last 50 years,

“I thought It was MONEY

World shortest jokes

World shortest jokes

Worlds shortest jokes:

1) 2 Women r sitting quiet.

2) 2 Sardars r playing chess.

3) GirlFriend pays the bill…!!!

Need more???

U r beautiful.:-

Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS

Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS

Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS:
“Me sick, no work”
Boss SMS back:
“When I am sick I kiss my wife try it”
2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss:
“Me ok, ur wife very sweet”

Husband, wife & spare tyre

Husband, wife & spare tyre

HUSBAND and WIFE are like 2 tyres of a vehicle

If 1 punctures, the vehicle can’t move further

M0ral:
always Keep a SPARE TYRE…

jeevan me ………

jeevan me ………

jeevan me paise, pyaar, dost,
sab kuch aata hai jaata hai,
par tode gaye daant phir nhi aate,
samajhdar ho ummeed hai msg bhejte rahoge

Independance day date

Independance day date

Bubbli got caugt on date
on Independance day
.
Major Rohail-
What is this?
.
Bubbli-
Dad today is freedom day,
so let me do what I want

Desperate to get married

Desperate to get married

Marriage is like a public toilet

Those waiting outside are desperate to get in
&
Those inside are desperate to come out..